But you’ve probably never heard of them anyways

• I liked the Chilean miners back when they were underground.
• That album you like? It was better on vinyl.
• I’m not a hipster!
• Hey guys, let me take a Polaroid of you.
• I read Hemingway at indie concerts.
• Everything you like, I liked five years ago.
• I listened to Justin Bieber when she was still a guy.
• Hey! It costs a lot of money to look this poor!
• Oh, it’s 90 degrees outside? Let me get my scarf.
• Ten is a conformist number.