1After a tough, excruciating tenure at the White House, Sean Spicer is now a National Correspondent with the New York Times, the organization from which he says he’s learned the most.

“Being objective and always reporting the facts… yeah, that was me,” Spicer said. “But in the White House, with all these distractions, Melania and Ivanka, man I was all over the place. I just couldn’t focus. I couldn’t speak straight.”

Spicer, pimped out in his “comforting” easter bunny costume, is now more laid back than ever. He follows a busy schedule, but makes sure to get free time every day. According to his assistant, Tronald Dump, when Spicer is not reporting he’s out in the nearby farms, mining for coal.

“Even after Sean got kicked out of the White House, he goes out to the potato farms with his shovel, supporting the coal miners who voted for the President,” Dump said. “Sean’s just got a yearning for coal. In the White House, he would ask me if he had time to go coal mining everyday.”

Many people believe Sean Spicer has found a good work-life balance now that he’s mining coal again. A recent Breitbart poll asked how Spicer’s career has been progressing after getting removed from the White House. More than 80% of people said his career has been revived not because he is at the New York Times, but because he is mining for coal. At least they know how good he is at journalism.  

Regardless, Spicer’s enjoying life in ways no one ever could have imagined. Apparently, Spicer has even started hosting weekly press-briefings after leaving the White House because he was having withdrawals.

“People think I hate reporters, but in reality, I actually enjoy it,” Spicer stated. “Now that I’m a reporter myself, I understand where they are coming from. I love it when they ask me tough questions.”