I like to consider myself a media connoisseur. Call me an entertainment enthusiast or a pop culture pundit, if you will. A snob? Sure. I can’t stand mainstream music and frequently wonder if I was born in the wrong generation. After all, current pop culture is objectively terrible. I mean, really? Do people really enjoy listening to Ed Sheeran and Taylor Swift? I despise music today. People just consume it mindlessly. Don’t get me wrong, though—I’d rather gatekeep the music I actually like from other people. I guess I’m stopping artists I like from getting more exposure, but I would rather have them to myself. I only listen to good music genres like new-wave proto-punk and progressive metalcore. Oh, and I listen to Radiohead. Objectively speaking, they’re the best band of all time. People don’t understand how special I am for liking them, but I really don’t want them to. Nobody understands me, period.

I spend my time hating other trivial things that have nothing to do with me.  I don’t understand why people still see rom-coms and musicals—they repulse me to no end. Mobile gamers aren’t really gamers. I really hate people that wear band t-shirts that haven’t even listened to the bands on their shirts. People need to be die-hard fans to be worthy of wearing merch. Posers are the worst. 

I especially hate K-pop and boy bands, among other things. I don’t even want to try listening to them. Why do teenage girls have such awful taste? Everything they like is so bland and vapid. TakeTwilight, for example—that series is probably the scum of the earth. (I can’t be sure because I haven’t read it.) Why is there a new TikTok dance trend every day? Everything on that app enrages me. I believe TikTok and other insipid platforms teenage girls use have brought about society’s decline. Nothing else did; everything is all the teenage girls’ fault.

I crave being unique. If I’m not being a contrarian at all times, I’m doing something wrong. I’ll explode if I don’t offer my two cents on everything. I can’t stop. I won’t stop. I’d rather force myself to hate everything and make myself and others miserable than conform to the norm. It’s all in a day’s work! Not hating things only leads to pop culture being oversaturated with basic people’s opinions. Actually liking things other people like is pathetic, and I refuse to give into it. Oh, but if there is something I actually love, it’s when my hatred is on a roll.