Bumper Stickers Need to Bump It Out Of Here

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Beep. Beep. Stop staring at my face (Caitlin Chen).

Vivian Hoang, Staff writer

It’s that tacky label affixed to a vehicle’s bumper. The obligatory “my daughter or son went to this prestigious educational establishment” cries for attention. The mini-billboard in support of a particular group or cause, except the deplorables, draws ire from any reasonable person. Bumper stickers are the precursors to Twitter, Snapchat, and Facebook where every opinion no matter how ridiculous is broadcasted to the world.

According to a study in 2008 from Colorado State University, there is a positive correlation between the number of bumper stickers on a car and the likelihood of the driver to express aggressive driving behavior. Bumper stickers are more than just dangerous and hazardous on the road. While the driver should be scanning the road, they are instead staring at the tiny message on the bumper sticker and run the risk of rear-ending your car. Psychologists at Ohio State University have studied the matter and have concluded that belligerent and antagonistic bumper stickers often incite road rage and other negative responses. Bumper stickers spell dangers for all drivers on the road.

Bumper stickers also depreciate the value of a car by tainting the exterior, bumping your appraisal from excellent to fair or poor. According to AAA Exchange, if you want to maintain your resale value, you must professionally washed and take care any other exterior deficiencies, such as removing any tacky bumper stickers.  As much as you want to tell people that we should save the humpback whales in Baja California, a bumper sticker is not the best way to show your support. If you want to make social commentary with your car, put a sign in the back window.