The Best Christmas Gift Ever


Michael Zhu, Staff Writer

On December 25, 2018, Joe King received the greatest Christmas gift ever. When interviewed about the gift, King described it as “life-changing” and “absolutely spectacular.” Unlike other Christmas gifts that are often seldom used and/or regifted, this item will stay in use forever. Recipients of this gift will certainly not be disappointed. According to King, this gift is great for a variety of reasons.

First off, this gift is applicable to all people, as everyone can use it and enjoy the benefits it brings. For example, it’s perfect for people who are introverted and don’t spend much time outdoors. No longer do you have to spend effort and get up from bed to go outside, as this gift brings the “outdoors” to you! In addition, this gift is extremely versatile and can be used for many other purposes: you can use it as a quick and easy souvenir to capture all types of memories, from your “Hawaii Trip” to “That Time We Had Horrible Air Quality And Missed A Day Of School.”

Second, this gift has numerous health benefits that improve bodily functions. According the Association of Scientific Studies (ASS), this product is shown to improve energy flow, metabolism, and heart flow, as well as reduce stress. In fact, you can feel the benefits almost instantly when using this gift. King describes it as “absolutely necessary for survival,” saying he literally can’t survive without it.

Finally, the best part about this gift is its affordability. You would think that this gift would be expensive, considering its astonishing features. However, this gift is 100% free. For zero dollars, you can use this item and enjoy its benefits forever. But wait, there’s more! This item will never run out as it is 100% replenishable. For such great value, recipients of this gift will surely be satisfied.

“I absolutely recommend this gift to anyone and everyone,” King says.

So what is this perfect gift you may ask? Well, if you haven’t already guessed, the best Christmas gift ever is—a bag of air.

So next time you are struggling to find the right gift for your friend, parent, or sibling, just find a stray bag in your house, at a store, restaurant, or even on the ground, fill it up with air, and give it to him/her. He/she will certainly not be disappointed.