As part of the Student Summer Affairs Investigation Committee (SSAIC), a Voice staff writer was sent to investigate the truth in student summer extravagancies. All characters and events are fictional; any resemblance to real procrastinators, living or dead, is purely coincidental. To protect the integrity and aura of those involved, the interviewee(s) shall only be known by their initials.
EK (10): “I made the mistake of only applying to RSI Boston and SIMR. I knew they were highly competitive summer programs, but getting an A in AP World in the first semester really boosted my ego. Of course, that was a mistake. I didn’t get into either, as I didn’t conduct research with Harvard professors in kindergarten, but whatever, I guess. It was a rough schedule I set up for myself. Wake up at five, prep for the SAT till nine, go to the gym, glow up, and make those losers on the admission committee REGRET rejecting me.”
EK, after failing her math final with a 67%, lay in bed all day in days past and scrolled reels till she ran out of reels and started watching YouTube shorts. Consequently, her vision depleted, as did her attention span. After a weak attempt on the SAT practice exam (problem 2, math section), she forgot slope-intercept form and gave up. However, she did take a photo of the one problem she solved and posted it on her Instagram spam, captioned “locked in #atethatup.” Indeed, she did not eat the problem up but rather ate the whole box of Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream. RSI and SIMR have yet to respond for comment on whether they truly regret rejecting her after the supposed transformation.
OW (11): “This summer, I was supposed to improve my social life, which has been deteriorating since freshman year. And I did. Another big thing I wanted to do was deep-clean my entire room and decorate it, which I have been meaning to do since Thanksgiving Break. The chocolate wrappers in my desk drawers need to be thrown away for sure — I can’t get more. After all, I have no money because I have no job, which I want to get this summer. Oh, and I wanted to create less work for myself by starting my college apps.”
OW’s social life was limited to messaging his friends, “bro im so cooked for senior year,” and “dude i started nothing im so locked out.” A group chat plan for going to Santana Row was postponed and later cancelled due to a lack of driver’s licenses and employment. OW did not touch a job application throughout the entire two and a half months, preferring to cry over his lack of productivity and progress in a Google Doc titled: “college apps.” He started deep cleaning on a sudden whim at 3 a.m. in late July, then lost motivation, resulting in a pile of papers and chocolate wrappers on the floor of his room for the next three months.
SSAIC Findings
The immense burnout that finals week (and in many other cases — see Crashouts Of Irvington) often reduces motivation in many students. Though most are not as extreme as EK and OW, this phenomenon of “recovery” over break manifests itself in many cases. For instance, the author and primary investigator herself is currently crashing out over her AP Lang grade and has spent the weekend recovering from the bombardment of exams and projects.
